Posted by Meg Soper, 05-08-2016

Have you ever wondered what factors are at work to explain why some people attract us and others repel us? For example, have you ever met someone and felt an immediate connection? No doubt you admired this person’s positive character and personality. But what about the opposite experience where you immediately clash with or take a dislike to the person you have met? Are they really difficult and undesirable or might some other factor be at work to explain the bad chemistry?

Understanding human personality has been a hot topic ever since the ancient Greek physician Hippocrates attributed people’s moods, emotions, and behaviors to an excess or lack of certain body fluids. Thankfully, behavioral science researchers have advanced our knowledge of such things since then, and have identified four personality styles and four accompanying styles of communication. The four styles are:

Everyone has a communication style which determines how you present yourself to others and how you are perceived by others. Another way of looking at it is to say that 75% of the population has a different style than you – not better, not worse, just different. Your communication style affects your ability to connect with others – whether family, friend, or co-worker. Communicating effectively with others depends on being able to identify their behavior style and then responding appropriately to it.

Our individual differences are what make us collectively stronger! That is because these differences will challenge our weaknesses and provide diversity in our thinking. Each one of us has a preferred behavioral pattern. Each of us has within us these four behavioral styles, but our core style has been within us since an early age.

For our second blog in this series, let’s focus on The Socializer.

The Socializer

The Socializer is defined by being people-oriented (vs. task-oriented) and direct (vs. indirect).

Since the Socializer is people-oriented, they are usually good with people and they care about the opinions of others. Just like the Supporter, people are their priority – they enjoy the company of others and tend to make decisions based on people-factors rather than strict facts.

The Socializer’s people-orientation together with their direct style creates a very dynamic, gregarious personality. They’re outgoing, competitive, inspiring, and they like to be in the spotlight and/or running the show.

You might be a Socializer if you are:

  • Influencing
  • Interactive
  • Upfront with your opinion
  • Risk taker
  • Impatient
  • Spontaneous
  • Loud and animated

Understanding the Socializer

“Hey guys, I’m here!”

Here are some essential things to know to help you understand and communicate effectively with a Socializer:

  • Their priority: recognition and approval
  • Their pain point: lack of attention
  • Their typical questions start with Who?
  • Performs best: when things are entertaining and fast moving, while avoiding direct involvement in details
  • Focus on developing a relationship with them

Understanding these personality styles helps us – as leaders, colleagues, friends, and, well, humans – learn to approach each other in the ways we want to be approached. Seeing what makes other personality types tick helps eliminate the communication barriers that can come up between people with different behavioral styles.


Meg Soper is a motivational humorist speaker who can help you learn to laugh along the way of life as you take on life’s stressors. Get in touch with Meg today!

Why does Meg get booked for speaking events again and again? Find out!

More posts? Bring it on!

About Meg Soper

Meg Soper is a leading motivational humorist for organizations in North America. Her unique perspective combines the insights and experiences of her last thirty years spent as a Registered Nurse, stand-up comedian, and ultimately a motivational speaker. Meg has co-authored two books and appeared on the CBC Television network, Women’s Television network, and Prime TV as well as on radio and at comedy festivals.